Unhinged Colon Club Retro Mascot

Create a bold vintage retro apparel graphic featuring a cute anthropomorphic cartoon colon mascot with an adorably unhinged expression, wearing a tiny varsity jacket and retro sneakers. Give the colon expressive eyes, little arms and legs, and a playful rebellious personality. Surround the mascot with small lightning bolts, stars, flames, and distressed retro accents. Add the exact text “UNHINGED COLON CLUB” in large arched 1970s collegiate lettering, with smaller text “EST. ONE FLARE AT A TIME” underneath. Use an unexpected vintage palette of oxblood red, faded teal, burnt orange, muted mustard, warm cream, and espresso brown. Thick hand-drawn outlines, imperfect vintage shapes, subtle worn ink texture, trendy retro mascot aesthetic, screen-print-inspired color separation without halftones, isolated on a transparent background, no mockup, no gradients.